Head vs Heart

I just returned back from a two week pilgrimage to Egypt - it was an ineffable experience that I will need to sit with for a while before I can even explain it.

One thing that stood out to me that I immediately noticed and wanted to share about the Egyptian culture is how they operate much more from their hearts versus their head.

From the ancient Egyptians and all I learned about them to everyone I encountered in my travels.

What was so interesting was even in the stores when a sales clerk was helping me with a purchase, they would tell me to hold it in my hands, close my eyes and FEEL what the decision was in order to make a purchase. 

This is so different from how we typically operate in our culture.  We think rationally, logically, very much relying on our intellect to guide us.  Asking ourselves questions like - is this a good deal?  Will I use it?  Is it practical?  Etc.

We’ve become so disconnected from our hearts and our feelings.

If we start to listen, we’ll notice how our heart speaks to us in just a clear yes or no.  Our minds come up with the reasons, justifications and all the other nonsense that comes up when making a decision.

Often times what the heart wants doesn’t make sense, it’s illogical.  So then logic is actually resistance to what’s in our hearts.  

Start tuning into your heart to feel your way into decisions. If something is a yes, do it anyway even if it doesn’t seem logical.  When you start listening to your heart over your head, your life starts to unfold much more effortlessly.

This has been a constant practice for me (and will continue to be) but I’m starting to experience the magic of it.

Try it.

XO

Adrienne

Be Here Now

You've probably heard this phrase before - my guess is so much so it's probably somewhat lost it's meaning.  Be here now, stay in the present, yea yea I get it.

Lately I've been realizing what it really means to be here now - and how much I'm not "here."  I noticed it when I was in the mountains admiring an absolutely stunning view but I was thinking about what I was going to eat for breakfast and what time I should leave to avoid traffic.

Our bodies are in one place but we're all over in our minds.  Our next steps, the past, events of yesterday, what we have to do today, a conversation earlier that day etc.

What we give our attention to is what we give our energy to - so when we're so caught up in the mental projections in our head we're siphoning energy out of the present moment.

I talk about how powerful our minds are but most people don't realize how powerful they are because when your mind is so scattered, your energy is all over the place diminishing its power.

It's not until you can get your mind to that single pointed focus when you can really harness that power - kind of like taking a magnifying glass to the sun.

It can get discouraging at times after all these years of meditation and working on my mindset, that my mind can still run away with itself.  But instead of getting discouraged, I get excited every time I catch my mind drifting. 

Awareness is always the first step to change and when you can become aware you're not present, that's a win.  And because our minds learn more when you celebrate instead of criticize, it helps to retrain your mind to catch yourself more and more.

Be here now.  And notice how much you're not.

XO

Adrienne

Enjoy the Process

If you've been following me for a while, you know I'm always talking about setting a big goal.  Which I do 100% believe in.

But something I tend to forget about is how you must enjoy the process.  I was reminded of this over the weekend when I ran the Golden Leaf half trail marathon in Aspen.

I ran this race in 2018 and it was my goal to run it again after I broke my ankle and had two surgeries over the past three years.  This little goal funnels into my bigger personal goal of being an ultramarathoner trail runner.

The first five miles of my race were a STRUGGLE!!!  My shoes were bothering me and I just wasn't feeling in tip-top shape that morning.  And my mind was going absolutely NUTS.  

I was stressed about my time, comparing myself to the people around me, putting so much pressure on myself and pushing harder and harder even though I wasn't feeling great.

Until I stopped and realized "What the heck was the point of this?!"  I love trail running because I find it to be meditative for me - I clear my mind, get connected to nature and get some of my best ideas when I'm on those runs.  But this was far from enjoyable because of the stress going on in my mind.

If I couldn't enjoy the actual race, what did it even matter if I hit the goal?!  I let go of what the outcome and my time, I ran when I could and walked if I needed a break.  I looked around, enjoyed the beautiful scenery, and started using mantras to focus my mind.  

I ended up finishing within my goal time and the second half of the race was MUCH more enjoyable.

It's important to have goals, but don't get so hung up on the destination you forget to enjoy the process because that's really what it's all about.

XO

Adrienne

Mind is Everything

I heard a quote over the weekend that really made me think: "If you were paralyzed from head to toe, but loved every thought you think, you wouldn't have any problems."

Take a moment to contemplate that.

It goes right along with everything I preach about - how it's not what happens to you, but it's what you think about what happens.

It's not that you have a broken arm, or a terrible boss, or an unsupportive spouse - it's that you think it shouldn't be that way and those thoughts make you suffer.

Our minds are incredible and they are powerful beyond what we even know.  The mind is a great servant but a terrible master.  When it serves you, it can bring you peace, joy and anything else you could want.  When it's your master, it's creating havoc in your life.

That's why I truly believe the work I do is so critically important.  Your mind is creating your world.  And if you don't know how to control your mind, it's going to control you.

You can make all the changes you want on the outside - change jobs, relationships, houses etc. but nothing truly changes until you change.  And it all starts with your thinking.

XO

Adrienne

PS...If you're ready to change your life by changing your mind, let's talk.  There's no time like the present.

Impermanence

The Buddha said that impermanence is the root cause of suffering.

As humans, we’re always grasping and clinging wanting things to stay the same.  

But absolutely nothing in life is ever permanent. Everything is always constantly in flux, always changing.

I had an experience with this over the weekend.  I’m currently training for a half trail marathon in a couple weeks.  

I love trail running, it’s something that brings me so much joy and really fills me up.  Not to mention the amazing sense of accomplishment after crushing miles on the trail  at elevation.  

I ran this half marathon in 2018 and in my mind I thought I’d be able to get a similar time.  Well as I’ve been training, I’m a heck of a lot slower than I was then.

A broken ankle, two surgeries and not to mention four years of getting older - why would I expect to run at the same pace?!? 

But somehow we don’t accept that things change and we get frustrated that they can’t always be as they’ve been. 

When we know things will never be exactly the same as they are right now, every moment is another chance to appreciate things.

Let’s embrace the impermanence of this world and use it as a tool to appreciate everything more instead of trying to keep things the same in an ever-changing world.

XO

Adrienne

Honesty

I've recently made a vow of radical honestly - to tell the truth no matter what.  Once I did that, I realized how often I don't.

Honesty is a funny thing.  No one wants to be lied to yet we lie to other people so we don’t hurt their feelings.

Like when someone asks you to do something you don’t want to do and you make up a little white lie as to why you can’t instead of being honest.  Or just say yes to something then stew in resentment about it.

Then there’s the areas where we lie to ourselves.  Tell ourselves we’re happy, things are fine, when we know in our heart that’s not entirely true.  Or that one scoop of ice cream won't break your diet.

Making a vow of honesty means I can't hide behind those little white lies anymore.  It means I have to be OK offending or upsetting someone.  I have to be OK sitting in the uncomfortableness of my own truth.

I don't expect everyone to do this but this is part of my journey to live my most authentic and integral life.  I also need to give myself grace and realize I'm not going to be perfect overnight and this will be a lifetime of work.

Start paying attention to where you aren't being honest.  Be brave and dare to say the thing you think you cannot say.

XO

Adrienne

Success

This is a topic I've been contemplating a lot recently.  What is success and what is my personal definition of success?

Society teaches us that success is making a lot of money, recognition, status, having nice things etc.  But is that true?  I know a lot of people that have those things and are miserable - is that success?!

When I was in my finance career, I had a lot of that but I still wasn't truly happy.  Don't get me wrong, it was nice to be able to buy myself anything and not have to worry about money.  

But basically I used all of that stuff as an escape and it would make me temporarily happy, covering up what I knew in my heart - this job wasn't for me.  I knew I was meant for more.

Success for me now is different.  It's about freedom, service, integrity, being in alignment with what's in my heart.  I'm still working on the definition and uncovering more about how I can be "successful" but it feels more true to me than my old definition.  

I encourage you to ask yourself - what does success mean for you?  I'd love to hear if you're willing to share :)

XO

Adrienne

What You See

As I work on living my most authentic life, I've become acutely aware of how I come across publicly.  Several people have said things to me about what a fun Summer I'm having based off of these emails and my social media.

I definitely am and am so grateful for it.  But I'd also like to share another side.  For everything you see, there's also a lot you don't see. 

My internal struggles around things like: 

-Re-navigating a social life without alcohol
-Worry and doubts that come in around my business 
-Disappointments from dates gone bad
-My weight and image

I know this is true for most people.  For everything we see on the outside from anyone posting or even smiling to our faces and saying "I'm doing great," there's always another side that we don't see.

We've been conditioned to believe that life should be great and happy all the time.  If it's not, then something is "wrong" with us.

That is absolutely not true.  In Buddhism, there is a saying about life bringing 10,000 joys and 10,000 sorrows - meaning that life is a continuous flux of both.  The more we try to push away the sorrows, the more we're not being true to ourselves and what life wants to bring us.

My work is trying to embrace all of it - both the joys and the sorrows knowing that both are just as fleeting.  When we try to hold on to the joys and push away the sorrows, that's when we create suffering for ourselves.

I felt the need to share this to shed light on the fact that we all struggle.  Even if our lives look fun and glamorous on the outside, there's always things we don't see.  So be kind - for everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about.

XO

Adrienne

Being vs Doing

You may know this about me (and I'm typically reluctant to share it) but I am really interested in plant medicines. 

They are incredibly powerful ways to access different parts of your mind for growth and healing.  On Friday I had the honor and privilege to participate in a ceremony that was one of the most beautiful and profound experiences of my life.  

A major theme of the experience was how much I DO.  Endlessly packing my calendar with work, appointments, activities etc. barely ever allowing myself to rest.  I saw how when I just BE and do nothing, I feel unworthy in a way.  Like I have to be constantly proving myself and earning my keep in this world.

Where does this come from?!  It seems like it's conditioned in so many of us.

What I learned is that it's ok to just BE sometimes.  To drop the struggle and effort and just let yourself do what feels good.  Let go of the FOMO or constant nagging "shoulds" that fill my mind when I relax or do something unproductive.  

We all are inherently worthy and don't have to prove ourselves with accomplishments and things.

To that end, I may not always send these messages out every Monday.  While I do find a lot of joy in writing these and they can be very therapeutic for me, if one day it doesn't, I'm not going to force it.  I am giving myself permission to BE and listen to what my heart and body want and need.

I hope you understand and also do the same for yourself.

XO

Adrienne

Booze Free Living

Life is different since I’ve taken a pause from drinking (8+ months and counting).  I can be so much more present to my life in every moment.  
 

I thought certain situations would be difficult for me like going to concerts but it turns out it hasn’t been.  It makes for a deeper, more intimate experience with myself and whatever I’m doing. 
 

At the Kenny Chesney concert this past weekend (yes, another concert) I was surrounded and squeezed in with people in the pit.  I felt every sensation - my feet hurting from standing in cowboy boots for 8 hours, sweat rolling down my back, smells of booze from the crowd, emotions bubbling up when some of my favorite songs came on etc. etc. 
 

You would think this would make me cave or even just to leave but it’s quite the opposite.  I feel so alive!  I’ve been training myself to breathe through and soak it all in, not judge anything as good or bad, just accept everything that happens.
 

It’s certainly not easy but I’m learning.


People frequently ask me if I am done with alcohol for good and it’s hard to say.  Honestly it’s extremely daunting thinking about never having a drink again.

So my answer is it’s my decision for now.  I’m proud of how far I’ve come and I recommit to this decision everyday.  I know each booze-free day is a brick in the life I want - one of presence, discipline and my best self.

XO

Adrienne

PS...If you don't already, I'd appreciate follows on social media!  Links to all my pages below.  Your support means more than you know!

Live Like You Were Dying

I love music and going to concerts is one of my favorite things to do, which is why I am beyond happy that they are back!  Over the weekend I went to two :)

I have very mystical experiences at concerts - something about the music that really moves me, the energy of the crowd and seeing musicians completely immersed in their craft all culminate to a deeply profound adventure for me.

During one of the concerts, I had the thought "What if this was my last concert ever?"  

In Buddhism, there is a practice of regularly contemplating your death.  

It sounds morbid but actually it's beautiful.  We walk around never thinking about our death, denying that it's ever going to happen.  When you keep death and the fleeting-ness of this life in the forefront of your mind, you start to experience everything differently, more deeply.

What if this was your last day?  The last time you saw this friend/loved one?  Last walk in the park, ice cream cone, concert?  Whatever it is.

You would savor everything a bit more, wouldn't you?!  

Death is certain.  It could be in 50 years, it could be tomorrow.  We have no idea.  The only thing we can do is live each day like it's our last.

Take that risk, forgive that person, make sure your people know you love them - treat each day like the gift that it is.

XO

Adrienne

Flow

Few things fill me up more than getting out in nature.  It's why I try to spend as much time as possible in the mountains.  

This past weekend I spent in beautiful Steamboat Springs.  Saturday afternoon I rented a tube and floated down the magnificent Yampa River that runs right through town.

As I work on going more with the flow and letting go of control, this was a perfect experience to remind me.

Sometimes there are obstacles you have to maneuver around, sometimes the water is choppy, sometimes it's fast and you're flying by and other times it's moving painfully slowly.  Sometimes you get stuck in a stagnant part and you have to exert a lot of effort to get out.

If you try to go upstream, it's a waste of energy and will just exhaust you.  When you can relax and let the river take you, the ride is much more enjoyable.

If we pay attention, life is always trying to teach us something.  What is yours trying to teach you?

XO

Adrienne

Letting Go

Confession: I'm a control freak. I spend a lot of energy trying making sure everything goes as I want it in my life.

Which is why I always used to be a nervous flyer. Trying to sit back and relax while I don't know exactly what's going on and someone else has control was very difficult for me to do.

Over the weekend, I had the opportunity to fly in a very small private aircraft - a Piper J3 Cub for any aviation buffs out there.

I thought I would be nervous but surprisingly I wasn't at all and it was an amazing experience! It was a perfect, clear Summer morning flying over the front range, seeing the Rocky Mountains and I was just admiring the beauty this magnificent state.

I felt confident and assured I would get back on the ground to our destination so I never felt the need to worry. Physics were on my side and once you know how a plane works, there's no need to worry.

As with most things I do now, I looked at this as a beautiful metaphor to life. As long as I set a destination - my goal- I can just sit back, relax and enjoy the ride. When you understand how the mind and universal laws (like the law of attraction) work, you can just rest assured you will end up where you want to be.

Spending so much energy on trying to control the outcome is a waste and sends the message that we don't trust ourselves and the universe which then creates resistance to the goal we're trying to reach.

I have been watching where I am trying to control and consciously letting go as much as possible. That doesn't mean sitting back and doing nothing, but it means falling in love with whatever you are doing now without being attachedthe outcome - developing more trust that everything will work out.

I like the mantra - Let Go & Let God. Where can you start to let go?

XO

Adrienne

PS...For the personal story of how I created this experience of getting to fly on this little private plane, check out my video on instagram here.

Freedom

Freedom is one of my highest values - both in life and in business.  

I cherish my freedom and I make it a point to contemplate and use my freedom often.

I notice when I speak to people how much they hold themselves in a prison of their own making.  And say things to me like "I can't do that because..."  Or "I wish I had time for that."  Or "Someday I'd like to do that."

Basically what I hear is - I am not free to do and live the way I want.  You're choosing to do something you feel obligated to do over what you actually want to do.  You're letting the present circumstance get in the way of the life you truly desire.

We're a product of all the decisions we make everyday.  Are you freed by the choices you make?  Or do they put you in a self-made prison?

Remember this is the land of the free and home of the brave.  We are extremely privileged to live in such a country.  Do something brave and exercise your freedom this week.

XO

Adrienne

PS...I'm excited about hosting a Women in Finance Networking Mastermind on Thursday 7/21.  Check out the details here and pass along to anyone you think would be interested!

Your Tribe

It's said that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.

I had the opportunity to mastermind with one of my amazing mentors and nine other incredible female entrepreneurs in NYC last week.

I'm not going to lie, when I first got there I was extremely intimidated being around these other 7&8 figure business owners with some remarkable achievements. But I had to remind myself that I was chosen and paid the money to be there just like the rest of them.

The day was so inspiring and uplifting and really helped me think bigger and stretch my mind. I was able to step into a higher version of myself and channel the version of me with my goal achieved.

It made me realize the importance of surrounding myself with people that help inspire that version of me; people who see me in that light and have businesses and habits I would like to emulate.

As we grow and expand into a new version of ourselves, sometimes that's difficult for the people around us who are so used to us being a certain way and are comfortable keeping us in that box.

Maybe it's time to create some space from those relationships that aren't serving who you want to be.

Are the people you spend the most time with people you admire? Want to be like/emulate? Supportive in your journey to become better? If not, start changing things up.


XO

Adrienne

PS...Check out the most recent podcast I was on with my friend Kristi Amdahl. I really enjoyed recording this one - it's personal and I open up about things I typically don't. Listen on one of these platforms: Spotify Apple Podcasts Google Podcasts

Perception

Perception is one of our higher mental faculties that we’ve been gifted as human beings.  It’s defined as a way of regarding, understanding or interpreting.

I went for a hike over the weekend where I had an incredible view of Denver and the surrounding area. 

I could see the different highways and neighborhoods and the patterns they created.  All looking so perfectly orchestrated - unlike when you’re down in them and there doesn’t seem to be much rhyme or reason to it.

Everything seems more orderly from a higher view - like a perfectly laid out plan.

When I’m faced with a problem, challenging situation, disappointments etc. it’s easy to get stuck in the story of it and feel like a victim.

But what if we can take a higher view of what’s happening?  Maybe we can't see it now, but if you were to “zoom out” of your life, there would be order, a reason or bigger purpose for what you’re experiencing.  Always moving you towards your highest good.

Wayne Dyer has said “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”

It’s a beautiful thing that we have the power to change our perception at any time.

XO

Adrienne

Alone vs Lonely

I spent this past weekend on a solo trip to Aspen - one of my absolute favorite places.

I love taking trips by myself - this time I found myself thinking a lot about being alone vs being lonely.

Up until three years ago, I was pretty much in a relationship since I was 16. I guess that phrase serial monogamist would have been a fitting label for me.

In the last three years, I've spent most of my time alone getting to know who I am and what I really want/need out of a relationship.

As proud as I am of all the work I've done on myself and the independence I've cultivated, it can be isolating at times.

The problem now lies in that I've gotten so used to being alone, I've built somewhat of a wall around myself. I can do anything I want alone - why do I need someone?! As one of my teacher says, if you live alone, there isn't anyone to tell you you're wrong. Which can be nice ;)

It's easy to be alone. And it's also easy to be in the wrong relationship out of fear or convenience. The delicate balance lies in being happy alone and without forcing something just because you're lonely.

Now the work for me lies in opening my heart back up while still being patient and not settling for anything less than I deserve.

Such is a great metaphor for all of life - being open to what comes without ever settling.

XO

Adrienne

Question Your Thoughts

According to research, we have around 60,000 thoughts per day. And about 90% of them are the same thoughts we had the day before.

Most of the time we are completely unaware of these thoughts; so engrossed in them we can't even see them.

If you start paying attention, you'll see most of them are reliving the past or worried about the future. They're flying through our mind with no conscious awareness and then making us feel a certain way - usually negatively.

That feeling then emanates out and attracts back to us more thoughts, situations and circumstances that match that same feeling.

And the loop goes on.

If you want to start feeling better, a great place to start is looking at your repetitive thoughts. And then questioning them - are they true?

If they’re not making you feel good, what can you think instead?

The more you can become aware of your thoughts, the more you can change them and the better you feel. The better you feel, the more that good feeling gets broadcast out and attracts back more good into your life.

The only thing we truly have control over in life is our thoughts, so why not start exercising that control?

XO

Adrienne

PS...If you want help learning how to change your thinking to create better results in your life, reply to this email or schedule a time with me here.

Courage

Ahh Memorial Day - the unofficial kickoff to Summer. A reason to celebrate, BBQ, spend time with family & friends.

We have so much fun we tend to forget the real reason for the holiday - to honor those who have died serving our country.

It makes me think of how courageous the men and women are that choose to serve our nation. To stand up for what is important to them.

Earl Nightingale has said the opposite of courage isn't cowardice - it's conformity.

I found myself wondering if I have courage. In some regards, yes I believe I do. I moved across the country without knowing anyone, I quit my job to start my own business, I force myself down black diamonds even though I'm terrified.

But in some areas, I still conform. I sacrifice my own needs and desires at times not wanting to upset the applecart.

-Avoiding a difficult conversation even if I feel hurt
-Not asking for what I need at the fear of sounding "needy"
-Agreeing to something just because everyone else is

I'm committed to designing the life I want and being a person I'm proud to be. With that, it is going to require even more courage - courage to honor myself first, not conform to what others expect of me and to stand up for what I believe in. It's a conscious decision I will have to make everyday.

Observe yourself - do you have courage?!

XO

Adrienne

Laughter as Medicine

There was a sign in my 4th grade classroom that said "Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other is gold."

I don't know why I remember that but something about it stuck with me even though I didn't really understand what it meant.

Over the last month, I had the opportunity to visit with some of my oldest and closest friends.

We've all been friends since high school and we're going on 20+ years of friendship.

After both weekends, my stomach hurt from laughing and I was so filled up from spending quality time with these special friends.

Friends that know me better than anyone, have been there for me though everything and I can be my silly, carefree self around.

Friends like that are hard to come by and I value them like gold.

You've probably heard that laughter is the best medicine. And it really is. It has the ability to immediately change any situation, mood or feeling.

If you're feeling down, stressed or just out of sorts - find some friends that make you laugh, watch a funny movie or even just think of something that always makes you laugh.

Guaranteed it will change your state.

XO

Adrienne